Dear SIMSR
Before I really begin to write this one, I find it funny that I am writing a letter but not to a person and that this letter can never be read by you. Yet, I want to write this letter.
To begin with, I want to tell you that I am leaving you. Yes, its true. In another 20 days I will be gone from this campus of yours. Only yesterday was I telling my friend that in the next 20 days there will be the "last few days" for so many things. I have to admit it that there is an intangible bond with you. The last 2 years that I have spent with you have not only been splendid but a great learning experience as well. I have learnt a lot from you. So many of us come and go and yet you stay where you are. You are selfless and always provide the warmth. I will miss walking on your roads when I felt alone and jumping and running around when I felt happy.
I cannot forget the first day when I met you. You seemed like a stranger, a complete one at that. I missed so many people when I came here and how can I forget the rains when I met you. You were flooded. Then I got used to you being there. I met some great people here and I owe you everything for that. I met the bad ones too but then I owe you again for those as well because they taught me what not to do in life.
Technically speaking, you have taught me the art to manage various things and those things include people. I do not really know how much I have managed to learn on that front but I know that I can do a reasonable job out of it. You have made me experience everything here, literally. The moments of joy when I did well in the exams and presentations, when I freaked out with my friends and all those times when I managed to deliver what I was supposed to. There were moments of anxiety during the preparations for the exams as well and yes you also introduced me to some very "great" profs here as well. Profs who made us slog like hell. There were moments of sadness in my personal life which did not last long only because of some great people I met here.
This feeling of leaving you keeps creeping in slowly everyday.It makes me sad and yet it makes me happy. Sad because this is the last phase of my tryst with campus life and happy because you have made me more confident a person. You have also taught me to remain grounded come what may. I want to be as selfless as you and somehow funnily a marketing job may not always permit me to do so.Yet i will try.
Thank you for everything SIMSR. You are the best.
From one of the many students who have experienced life:
Vikram
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Furher Bunker
My first attempt to write a story. The story is fictitious and yet in many ways it is true.
7 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
The diluted wine had never had such an effect on him. For that matter he had never had so much of it together. Yet today he wanted to drink. The thought of dying a death such as this was too humiliating. He knew though that any amount and any kind of it would not let this feeling disappear. He was dying today.
He looked around. The room was too dingy. It was a hideout. He was hiding and he could not digest it. For all that he had won, he was just another human today. His mother came to his mind. The most beautiful woman in this world. 'Alois' is what she called him. It was cold and he had never felt so cold. He had a dream which was almost turning into a reality. Now it was all a matter of time. The world would despise him for years to come and yet there would be some who would always look upto him.
Eva was asleep. He looked at her. An angel. For the first time in years and years, he felt emotional. He stood up and looked outside the tiny window. It was early morning, probably 7 am and it would take another 3 hours for them to locate him.
8 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
His mother always told him that he would be the greatest and in a way he was. He was surprised the way he was thinking today. Was it the proximity to death? Till yesterday he felt unstoppable and yet today he was doubting himself. He knew what it was. He had never had the time to question himself twice. It was the flow. it was the expectations his people had of him. His army, his troops all looked upto him like he was the messiah and how can a messiah let his disciples down.
He knew he was a killer and today when he was all alone he felt the feeling overcoming him. He pulled the drawer and took out the pistol. He kept it back. He was shocked. He knew what had happened. He was scared of dying. The greatest man on this earth.A soldier. He was scared of losing his life. Oh!! what a loser he was. He let his thoughts frustrate him a little more. He knew only they could instigate him to kill himself. The guilt will pull the trigger eventually.
9 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
He hated the jews bitterly. He hated them even now and yet he knew why he had not slept a wink in the last 5 years. He was too proud to admit it. He got too carried away. He knew that deep down somewhere he was a cold blooded murderer, a rapist, inhumane and yes he was a narcissist. He loved himself and his ideas so much that he could go any extent to turn them into reality. So many women and children had died.
He suddenly remembered this old woman in a jew apartment that the German army had raided. She was on a wheelchair. All her family members had been shot down and she was crying and wanted to be shot as well. One of the young German officers felt offended by the request. "How dare she request, this motherfucking jew and how dare you oblige by holding the gun at her you bastard" he said to one of his subordinates. He pushed the wheelchair to the edge of the apartment window. He then pushed it out along with the woman. She fell 3 stories and died. He was there standing right next to him. For one moment he was appalled and yet he felt powerful.How stupid he was.
Suddenly he felt his eyes wet and then he started crying. He had not cried in ages and yet today he saw a different side of himself. Eva suddenly got up and noticed him. She came next to him to comfort him. He then heard a jeep and murmurs in Russian.
10 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
He quickly opened the drawer and took out the revolver. He moved to the bed and kissed Eva. He told her how sorry he was and how much he loved her. He killed her first and then he killed himself. The Russians broke in. The captain looked at the bodies and smiled. He told his subordinate to send a wire immediately to the colonel," Tell him that Hitler is dead".
7 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
The diluted wine had never had such an effect on him. For that matter he had never had so much of it together. Yet today he wanted to drink. The thought of dying a death such as this was too humiliating. He knew though that any amount and any kind of it would not let this feeling disappear. He was dying today.
He looked around. The room was too dingy. It was a hideout. He was hiding and he could not digest it. For all that he had won, he was just another human today. His mother came to his mind. The most beautiful woman in this world. 'Alois' is what she called him. It was cold and he had never felt so cold. He had a dream which was almost turning into a reality. Now it was all a matter of time. The world would despise him for years to come and yet there would be some who would always look upto him.
Eva was asleep. He looked at her. An angel. For the first time in years and years, he felt emotional. He stood up and looked outside the tiny window. It was early morning, probably 7 am and it would take another 3 hours for them to locate him.
8 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
His mother always told him that he would be the greatest and in a way he was. He was surprised the way he was thinking today. Was it the proximity to death? Till yesterday he felt unstoppable and yet today he was doubting himself. He knew what it was. He had never had the time to question himself twice. It was the flow. it was the expectations his people had of him. His army, his troops all looked upto him like he was the messiah and how can a messiah let his disciples down.
He knew he was a killer and today when he was all alone he felt the feeling overcoming him. He pulled the drawer and took out the pistol. He kept it back. He was shocked. He knew what had happened. He was scared of dying. The greatest man on this earth.A soldier. He was scared of losing his life. Oh!! what a loser he was. He let his thoughts frustrate him a little more. He knew only they could instigate him to kill himself. The guilt will pull the trigger eventually.
9 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
He hated the jews bitterly. He hated them even now and yet he knew why he had not slept a wink in the last 5 years. He was too proud to admit it. He got too carried away. He knew that deep down somewhere he was a cold blooded murderer, a rapist, inhumane and yes he was a narcissist. He loved himself and his ideas so much that he could go any extent to turn them into reality. So many women and children had died.
He suddenly remembered this old woman in a jew apartment that the German army had raided. She was on a wheelchair. All her family members had been shot down and she was crying and wanted to be shot as well. One of the young German officers felt offended by the request. "How dare she request, this motherfucking jew and how dare you oblige by holding the gun at her you bastard" he said to one of his subordinates. He pushed the wheelchair to the edge of the apartment window. He then pushed it out along with the woman. She fell 3 stories and died. He was there standing right next to him. For one moment he was appalled and yet he felt powerful.How stupid he was.
Suddenly he felt his eyes wet and then he started crying. He had not cried in ages and yet today he saw a different side of himself. Eva suddenly got up and noticed him. She came next to him to comfort him. He then heard a jeep and murmurs in Russian.
10 am, Berlin, Germany,1945
He quickly opened the drawer and took out the revolver. He moved to the bed and kissed Eva. He told her how sorry he was and how much he loved her. He killed her first and then he killed himself. The Russians broke in. The captain looked at the bodies and smiled. He told his subordinate to send a wire immediately to the colonel," Tell him that Hitler is dead".
Sunday, March 8, 2009
I salute the skies.....
An average of 7 IAF jets crash every year in India. Many Indian pilots have lost their lives in this process. We tend to remember those who lose their lives on the battlefield and yet for a defence personnel everyday is like a battlefield. The pilots of the IAF fly everyday and conduct test runs to keep themselves prepared for a war. Many lose their lives. This poem is dedicated to all those who lost their lives in many such test runs. I salute the families who with strength and confidence send the pilots into the skies to do their job. For me they, our pilots, are the sky itself.
आखरी अलविदा
बादलों को चूमता था रोज़ मैं ,
निकलता था आकाशों की सैर पर,
सबसे ऊपर, सबसे दूर और सबसे तेज़,
अपने घर को ढूँढने की कोशिश किया करता था.
मन्न तो हमेशा किया की ले चलूँ उसे भी,
दिखाऊं दुनिया इक अलग सी, एक अनोखा सफ़र,
साथ था उसका की मैं निडर होके चला जाता था,
धरती को छूते ही घर लौट आता था.
खुद को देखता था उस छोटे से मुझ में,
हाथ में होती थी उसकी एक छोटी सी प्लेन,
'बनूँगा मैं भी आपके जैसा' बोलता था,
उठा के उसको लगा लेता था गले मैं.
अब भी उन्ही बादलों में हूँ मैं,
अब भी हूँ उन्ही के साथ और रहूँगा,
भले ही अब घर वापिस ना जा सकूं,
भले ही उन्हें गले न लगा सकूं,
हूँ मैं उन्ही के साथ हमेशा .
V.V.Vikram
आखरी अलविदा
बादलों को चूमता था रोज़ मैं ,
निकलता था आकाशों की सैर पर,
सबसे ऊपर, सबसे दूर और सबसे तेज़,
अपने घर को ढूँढने की कोशिश किया करता था.
मन्न तो हमेशा किया की ले चलूँ उसे भी,
दिखाऊं दुनिया इक अलग सी, एक अनोखा सफ़र,
साथ था उसका की मैं निडर होके चला जाता था,
धरती को छूते ही घर लौट आता था.
खुद को देखता था उस छोटे से मुझ में,
हाथ में होती थी उसकी एक छोटी सी प्लेन,
'बनूँगा मैं भी आपके जैसा' बोलता था,
उठा के उसको लगा लेता था गले मैं.
अब भी उन्ही बादलों में हूँ मैं,
अब भी हूँ उन्ही के साथ और रहूँगा,
भले ही अब घर वापिस ना जा सकूं,
भले ही उन्हें गले न लगा सकूं,
हूँ मैं उन्ही के साथ हमेशा .
V.V.Vikram
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