Q&A: The Good, The Bad and The Neutral

One normal day and three thought provoking questions. All from different spheres of life. Thinking about the answers, honestly took me a long time.

Question 1: (Scene- 10 am , having coffee with my 88 years old grand ma and so sleepy that I was least prepared for a serious conversation )
I was sipping hot filter coffee and cursing the American government for not stopping Israel from bombing Palestine. My grandma suddenly heard me muttering abuses when she said, “ You are an MBA now, so tell me now that India is slated to become the next superpower , will we also behave the same 4 decades down the lane and if not, then why do you think we will not?”

I was shaken up from my deep slumber and did not know what to say. I could have given her a random answer but i wanted to think because the question was interesting and tricky, but I said I would want to think about it and answer.

Question 2: (Scene- 5 pm, sitting next to the most intelligent and vociferous girl, lets call her C, I could ever come across in my life. I was always prepared for the most twisted conversations with C but this one caught me by surprise)
I was watching out of the car window at a decorated vehicle with a “Just Married” sign on it. Suddenly C tells me that 80% of married girls are shit scared and paranoid and worried when they sit in that car and are off to the groom’s house. The drive in the decorated vehicle is like passing though a graveyard after midnight. Then she was telling me as to how things have deteriorated with more money. The Question was – “Will you allow the girl’s family to pay entirely for the marriage as per custom or will you share the marriage costs 50-50 as its your marriage as well?” . My reaction as always was,” how the F#$%$ does she think about so hatke”.

Well again I never gave away the answer immediately and told her that I needed to think because this again was tricky and practical.

Question 3: (Scene- 9 pm, catching up with friends, we finally started discussing our favourite topics- G.I.R.L.S and we were always disappointed with the Indian girls. Few pegs down we decided that today’s Indian girls were the most confused species on this earth)
My friend K is going through a very tough typical phase in his life. He had had a break up with his girlfriend and was so used to her that he felt terribly lonely. He needed a friend (and just a friend mind you)and somehow he realised that girls specially were very difficult to approach. His question was clichéd and yet it of all 3 questions was the most difficult to answer,” Why are Indian girls so cautious about guys around and why do they never open up easily? Why do they always believe that guys always look for love and not friendship?”

A real toughie and not because its a 2 in 1 question but because girls are labyrinthine creatures.

When I think of it, I can tell you that the one thing common across the questions is the Indian culture. Sadly enough what unites us all today is also in a way the reason for the many problems that arise in the country.India is facing the typical problems that a developing nation faces when it is on its way to become a developed one. I hate the word “superpower” because I believe that it portrays arrogance and India could become anything but it can never be arrogant. When we reach there, and I am sure in another 3 decades we will be there, we will be ahead of the other developed nations only because of our culture and value system. We will be big but will never let others know about it. We will be rich but will also give at the same time. We will be unstoppable and yet we will never forget the friends on the way. So the answer to my Grandma’s question is that we will be a superpower, but one with a difference.

When I started to think about C’s question I realised the relevance of it. Why should the girl’s side bear all the costs of the marriage? After all it is the guy who is getting married as well. We tend to hide behind norms and customs and take advantage of them. We let impractical customs continue because they have been happening from olden times. The father of the girl saves and saves and blows it up for his daughter’s marriage to end up, at times, without a pie for the family post-marriage. What about the guy who is earning big bucks in the US of A sitting in the plush office in silicon valley. He is probably earning more than what the FIL can save. Is he not to contribute to his own marriage? The answer to your question C, is “ Thank you, you opened my eyes. Yes i will contribute 50-50. I have an ego and it is my marriage as well”.

Girls!!! Phew!!!. Complex creatures man. Yet they are quite stuck up I feel in the culture of today. Men have always had the advantage of well being men. Never stopped. Never questioned. Girls are opening up today and yet they are stuck in between cultural shifts and their emotions. Their outlook is guided by parental pressures, holdups and their desires. Men are no less but girls seek attention and yet don’t allow guys beyond a certain limit of their range. Girls are not safe no longer in Independent India. They cannot roam around like guys beyond a time, they are not encouraged to study. Improve the conditions and girls will change for good. I respect them and I don’t mean to sound like an MCP. I believe that they are cautious more because of external factors than internal ones.

Teere aishe dube gelam (Drowned just near the shore)

When everything comes easy in life, you can never appreciate its value. Its only when its coming in hard that you understand its importance and most importantly your weaknesses.

V.V.VIKRAM- 25 years old- very short of becoming an MBA. I was not really born with a silver spoon, no way as i still have huge outstanding amounts on my credit cards which i used too religiously. But now if i look back at life, I have never really faced dire situations which have made me question my potential. I got into my engineering college easily, i got a job at satyam computer services in the first go. I loved my job...it was just perfect for me and of course i did manage to get a decent enough percentile without really putting in an effort to get into a B-School. I did not face many dejections. But yes, to be honest i was always a little scared of things coming too easy, so at least i did not let it get into my head. I knew that one day, like all things get evened out, my luck would not be as good anymore. Somehow i do feel that 2008 has been the year of realisation for me. Not many great things have happened. In fact the year for me personally did start on a pretty bad note.

The ending too seems similar. I have faced many rejections today. My placement process has started and hahaha and thanks to the crisis, i am not yet placed. I have faced two close rejections on day zero. I did not make it into ICICI and HCL. HCL was really bad as i came too close to getting a job. I felt dejected and i should be but then i also felt good that at least i have seen what it feels like. Now i am sure i will be more positive and less nervous about the negative outcomes of life.

I feel much more confident today. I feel that i will be more of myself in the next interview than projecting someone whos desperate to get a job. I will be more relaxed for sure after this. I know that what happens after this will only be super duper.

MY POEM ASKS ME

When you put me into words,
Do you end up saying what you wanted to?
When you explain your state of mind through me,
Do you convey what you wanted to?
This is what my poem asked me.

When you paint the world dark through me,
Do you actually go through a lot of pain?
When you blame the world for all that pain,
What do you lose and what is it that you gain?
This is what my poem asked me.

When you show me around to all your friends,
What do they say? do they like me?
What happens to me if i dont come out well,
Do you get rid of me or do you hide me?
This is what my poem asked me.

After years go by and you read me again,
Do you laugh at me or do you cry?
After reading me again do you sit and wonder,
As to why i sounded sad and dry?
This is what my poem asked me.

V.V.Vikram

WHO KNOWS

Hmm.....donn dwell too much into why i wrote this one.....some wounds just take a wee bit too long to heal....and thts when you tend to question urself too much....so just read on....

so many things i remember,
so many things i just cannot forget,
all like a picture framed in my mind,
how do i let go off these memories,
how do i appease my heart?
who knows?

so many words unspoken still,
waiting to be heard by you,
will you ever hear them?
who knows?

there are questions unanswered,
i know it and so do you,
why the silence between us then?
who knows?

there is a sadness inside my heart,
a pretension of happiness everytime,
will it ever subside?
who knows?

i regretted every moment i hated you,
i still love you the way i did before,
do you feel the same?
who knows?

so many times i miss you,
so many times i cry,
everytime i try to live,
everytime i die,
will you ever come back?
who knows?


V.V.VIKRAM

When Regimes Change: Obama-Mania

Phew!!! the US elections finally got over and the verdict was well in a way preidctable...Obama won. Though he was slated to do so, many of us around the world still remember the all time closely fought Al Gore-Bush Jr. election way back in 2000 and noone really believed in speculation till the news was official.

Anyways, the triumph was more for all the minorities across the world and truly so as Obama has become the first afro-american President of the US of A . Nations across the world watched closely as his arrival would have different implications for them. We watched too, us Indians, who rarely bother to wait and watch the end results of our own elections. Obama in a way is different from Bush. Bush played a very different game. In fact I wonder at times whether he took all the press reports and media speculation too seriously way back in 2000 to prove a point. Bush was always expected to do more for his own country than for the world before he became president. He was an internal guy who dint know much about world affairs (he didnt know who our Prime minister was, when asked in a talk show days before he became president). Yet, today he is responsible for causing havoc in middle eastern countries like Afghanistan and Iraq. I mean who would expect a guy not reacting immediately when told about 9/11 in a pre-school poem recital to have reacted that way. He screwed it up really but then somehow managed to come back to power again.

Was McCain right for India? Well, technically speaking he was as he would have continued to implement policies laid down by the Bush regime and blame dubya for whatever, he did bring India in a big way in the global arena. Trade was never better and our relationship with USA today is all because of the Bush regime. Bush considered India as the only other real democracy after the USA. Yet, what Obama has given to the people of USA, Bush could never give and that was HOPE. Hope to live life better, hope to live life in a peaceful world, hope to live with closed ones forever and with others in harmony. Bush's rhetoric was always about the world outside when it was his own people that needed solace and comfort.

Will Obama live upto his vision, only time will tell but India is a little worried with Obama looking to cut outsourcing and looking to get back strongly on the all-forgotten CTBT. Yet, history has shown that the democrats have been always more calmer and charismatic.

Obama has come in at tough times. The Financial crisis is looking to shake the foundations of the strong economies across the world. Both Afghanistan and Iraq wars have backfired as both civilians and American soldiers have been victims of civil unrest. And of course, most countries have a problem with the superpower, big-nosy-daddy image of the USA. Experts, expect Obama to take some serious decisions which may have negative implications for many countries including India. But they also say that he will be the safest bet in the future run

Memoirs of the Past

This was not meant to be a poem really....because there are many things that have changed today and yet every time i go back home all grown up i miss these two things about my old house......

My house, how big it was once,
When i was a kid, I would hide and never be caught,
A new hiding place i would find everyday,
A new game everyday i would learn to play.

I would stare at the long coconut trees,
Watering them and imagine them grow an inch longer,
I would giggle as i felt dizzy watch the trees sway,
I would turn around in circles to fall down.

I would wait for the candyman at the gates everyday,
Keenly listening to his deliberately made up cacophony,
The sound of his cycle bell causing a tingle down my spine,
I would wait with my hands holding on the 'aath aana' tightly.

Today the house remains no more,
I live in a matchbox of an apartment,
I yearn to catch a breath of fresh air,
I give up to switch on the air conditioning.

The candyman comes still but is old and unable to shout,
He his become the boogeyman for all the kids around,
He looks up to my balcony recognising me,
And i see on his face a melancholy.

Every small thing felt mine before,
But now i feel otherwise,
In my own house i feel like a prisoner,
The journey of my life is not mine anymore.


V.V.Vikram

Think Beyond Present!!!!

What happens when you dont pursue your dreams? You feel like a loser....not once but many a times. Life sucks even more when u settle for the commonplace careers or those which everyone pursue or for that matter those which never interest you.

I dreamt of a life full of music, a life where i could entertain. Not that i have turned 65 and i cannot do that any longer but somehow everytime i look beyond i see a an obvious pattern my life will follow. A pattern that scares me. Fortunately or unfortunately, the so called 'second generation planning' that the old man talks about is an inherent quality inside individuals. In fact it comes too easy. I say this because the easiest thing for a human is to settle for alternatives. We conveniently percieve the environment to be changing so that we could happily change all the time.

I always wanted to be a DJ....now donn u laff....but its true. I still love mixing tracks and i am letting this out the first time. But i have mixed plenty....not that great but i have tried to in my own way and i do know that i wud hav made a good one....a DJ that is. It was really about me identifying my core competencies, and i know that i have a sense for music. Music turns me on. Listening and jiviing to good music is probably more orgasmic than an orgasm itself.

I still wish that probably 10 ears down the lane i am doiing some thing in the field of music. I dont want name or fame i just want to if possible gloss a piece of the dream with my colors of reality....and even a piece of it wud do.